I'm supposed to be doing revision but yeah, that can wait heh.
It's been quite an interesting month or two for me and i figured i might as well talk a little about how things have been.
So, in the beginning of July, i finally moved out of the hostel into this Metroview condominium and up til now, i have yet to take any photographs of this place to show.
It was quite an experience and initially i had my doubts. I mean, i was after all, slowly getting used to living in the hostel. However, i went with the decision (which was a year's postponement from my initial plan). In the process, i discover that when people leave, some people grow. And it touched me greatly.
Photo courtesy of Gerard
It was a crazy month. Two crazy days of scouting furniture in the midst of preparing for a week's fund raising. One crazy week of fund raising and somehow i managed to stay awake without sleep for 24 straight during the last day of fund raising. I was practically a student rushing assignment (which i screwed up) during the 12 hours of the nocturnal hours and a full time fund raiser during the day. It was a bittersweet birthday experience and honestly, i cannot recall how i even felt about piling up another digit onto my soon-to-end teenage life.
Photo courtesy of Rose
And then i sneaked back to Kuching for a weekend. People asked me what it was for and to be truly honest, i just needed that. Since when do we need a reason to be home and to be with family?? At the same time, i felt the short escape could help me rediscover my sanity, reconnect with my family, catch up with a couple of friends, say goodbye to a good friend who was leaving Kuching. I know how Kuching would be so different without him and how lost i could be without him around (funny how that happens even at home eh), but then i've had enough partings in this lifetime to teach me that true friendships aren't determined by time and space. So in my heart, i know i'd always wish the best for him.
Photo courtesy of Salina
Upon returning to KL, i was ambushed and damnit, forced into a skirt for a Passover meal. The meal was pretty significant, i only wished it were in English or that i better understood Mandarin. But i kept in mind that God works through many other things and touches the heart, not the intellect.
Photo courtesy of Julius
And then i was back kicking and struggling in daily KL life. For such a crazy kick off of the month of July, i was extremely relieved to meet up with a Kuching friend in KLCC because he is my best friend who would always make things seem lighter than they really are somehow. In the process we messed up the minds of housemates who witnessed our "reunion". They meant well and were joking, but i remain amused at how people tend to view our friendship- which is purely just that!
I was glad to close off the crazy month by celebrating the gift of friendship and sharing in the life of a friend by going all the way to St Thomas More and travelling all the way back here. (And glad to have an excuse to have lamb). It reminds me that in life, we may have grown somewhat apart, lost track of things but certain things remain always.
Photo courtesy of Julie
And well August is just as crazy. Things start to get a little different for me in class. I'm starting to get to know my other classmates better all of a sudden (we hardly spoke before this) and i'm surprised to find that i'm not too alone in my struggles here after all. In fact, i think i see a certain dim of light at the end of the tunnel and i thank God for affirming that He will indeed answer my prayers..in His own time. I do not know how far away that light is, but i know for sure that hope truly exists and i'd find my way out. I'm praying and hoping for the best. Whether or not i'd be continuing my studies here in Tar College after completing my Diploma, i'll let the Big guy up there worry and decide (pls let it be a no though). For now, i'm only concerned about my finals, which i will give my best at and then count on grace, no matter how i perform at it.
In the midst of all these things happening and people i meet, i find that i'm really trying to find myself. Sometimes, i'm even almost certain that i'm facing an identity crisis, with certain events pointing hard in that direction. Things i say and things i do varying when in the company of different people.
But to heck with everything, because i will somehow pull through in time and be who i'm made to be. Somehow, i'm beginning to discover my Saviour more and more through all these things. I'm thankful that after all these years, i'm finally making an effort to try live each simple day journeying with the knowledge that He'll never fail or leave my side. All of a sudden, i am naught but five loaves and two fish. I have nothing, know nothing but will still somehow fit into the plan of providing for others. And so be it.
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