I think it's probably time to post some happy stuff here. I feel like i've been drowning this place with musings only. So i woke up this morning and in the shower, i decided to stop floating on air for a moment and touch the ground. I thought of things i have to be grateful for right here and right now. In no particular order;
1. Nature. Ironic as it may seem, since this is KL we are talking about, Tar College is actually very green. I love how i can just go down my block, sit on the bench and enjoy the breeze which comes quite occasionally.
2. People. I know how i always talk about my family and friends at home. I miss them sorely. However, i have been pleasantly surprised at the friendliness of people here. I mean, this is the big city after all. Despite differences, especially in terms of language and mindsets, i must admit that i don't have much to complain about here. Naturally it's more difficult to forge close friendships in a new place (yes, i know it's been almost a year here but nonetheless) but so far, i've been very much accepted and respected here. From my classmates to roommate to hostel mates to very recently CSS members, who have made me feel much warmth and at home. Their humility and willingness to accept changes touch me.
3. Dreams. In an unexpected way, the way i have never imagined before, i find the unutterable dreams i have for BSC being fulfilled here. I can't really explain it. It's more of a feeling and how things fall into place with CSS in a right way. Of course, it is not quite the same as what i had in mind. But in life, what is?
4. Friends. They say that you make your life- long friends in school. It hasn't been an easy year. I'm so so glad that even as i enter college, we do not lose touch. And there are the people i know i can always bug. Perhaps with a text message which is filled with nonsense. Or just a gesture to keep in touch and say i think about you. A friend i can call when i need to. A friend who will not judge. A friend who will just ask how everything is once in a while. A friend who will text just to annoy me. And more. You guys are the best.
5. Gym. I started going to the gym, though not very regularly. It's cheap since it's in the college. Something i never had the chance to do so before and i must say that it is quite rewarding.
6. Activities. I've been keeping myself busy. I got back to the routine of hostel prayers twice a week. Recently i enrolled myself in a Discipleship class and it's crazy. It's held in Mandarin. LOL. I'm not sure what has gotten to me. But it's no harm learning more about God's Word and learning another language eh? (I also caught myself watching a few episodes of Korean drama. Wth is happening to me?) There are also the upcoming CSS activities i'm looking forward to.
7. Family. I think my family plays a major part in what keeps me going. It is sad that physical space separates us. But in a weird way, it is what keeps me going and strengthens me. The thought that i will be going home. The thought that i will be seeing them soon and everything is going to be fine. The thought that they gave everything up for me to be here. The fact that for my future, they give up the time they can see me at home. Home is what awaits.
8. Decent education. Not everyone has the chance to be educated. And that in itself, is something to be grateful for already.
9. Transportation. This probably sounds ridiculous. Because everyone knows KL is a sickeningly packed city and really, transportation is a daily problem. For a Kuching-nite so pampered with the luxuries of a car and the lack of long queues, it should be annoying to use public transport in KL. But heck, it is the long awaited buses and trains that can still connect people when they have to. One day i'm going to look back at this and when i see a train i'm not going to remember how long i waited for it, but i'm going to remember that it took me to KL Sentral. To meet my friend. And it took us to KLCC. Where we got chased out by the security guard. For playing the guitar and singing in front.
And i'm also thankful for the random car rides i've had the chance to sit in. I really appreciate car rides ever since i came here.
10. Above all, the Big Guy Up There. For those who are skeptical about the existence of God, it is alright. Sometimes, we think that this belief is a choice. To me, it isn't. It is a privilege. I am privileged to be able to believe in an ever- loving God despite how my scientific brain tells me that is utter rubbish. A privilege to know that no matter how i fall, it does not matter. Someone out there understands and will never condemn me. And i wanna thank those who have reminded me this time and again..sometimes without knowing it.
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